Just go here now for the whole slippery story. Parody can never be this funny.
Just one tiny snip: Here’s the headline from the print edition of the Global Times:
‘Brain-eating Parasitic Worms No Cause for Alarm’
What would our lives be like without English-language Chinese media?
1 By King Tubby
Steady on Richard. They have now been chickenised. No problem.
May 20, 2011 @ 9:47 am | Comment
2 By Chaon
What’s all this about “adulterated Peking Duck”? Do you have something you need to tell us, Richard?
May 20, 2011 @ 11:49 am | Comment
3 By S.K. Cheung
The Chinese government probably marches to to different standard when it comes to food safety. I mean, 14 of 26 samples from Indonesia testing positive for worms means 12 of 26 samples didn’t have it. There’s almost a 50% chance of NOT eating something that will rot your brain and cause epilepsy, so clearly there is no cause for alarm.
May 20, 2011 @ 12:48 pm | Comment
4 By yourfriend
The CCP once again shows it’s a limp-wristed, foreigner-loving, parade of cheap political whores.
May 21, 2011 @ 2:35 am | Comment
5 By Other Lisa
I don’t know about you, but I feel greatly consoled!
May 21, 2011 @ 9:04 am | Comment
6 By justrecently
IC some evidence from #4 that the worm may pose a threat after all.
May 21, 2011 @ 10:23 am | Comment
7 By S.K. Cheung
Not quite sure what to make of #4. Is the CCP “foreigner-loving” because it allows the import of foreign eels (especially ones that contain a surprise inside)? Is the CCP being “limp-wristed” because it is actually acknowledging a problem (though downplaying it, of course) rather than sweeping it under the rug as per usual? And where did the “cheap political whores” come from? So many questions…
May 21, 2011 @ 12:49 pm | Comment
8 By Richard
Ferin/yourfriend’s stupidest comment ever.
May 21, 2011 @ 12:51 pm | Comment
9 By slim
It’s creepy when a person can be anti-CCP while leaving the strong impression that s/he might actually be more severely morally unmoored than the CCP.
May 21, 2011 @ 1:09 pm | Comment
10 By King Tubby
Look. friend, Red Star and a couple of the HH Posse are truly unhinged creatures and the sooner they are packed off to the rubber room the better for common humanity.
And you only exacerbate their mental deterioration by responding to their projectile …..
Richard, SKC, FOARP???
May 21, 2011 @ 4:46 pm | Comment
11 By yourfriend
It’s obvious, they allow other nations to slander and smear Chinese exports but say nothing when defective or poisonous products are imported back.
May 21, 2011 @ 9:28 pm | Comment
12 By Richard
KT, yourfriend and Red Star are here simply for comic relief. At least yourfriend has a mind (though you wouldn’t know it from his recent comments).
May 21, 2011 @ 11:23 pm | Comment
13 By S.K. Cheung
To #11:
ahhh, but there’s the rub. For the CCP to go after Indonesia etc for sending them value-added eels would first mean that the CCP would have to acknowledge a food-safety problem in China. Acknowledgment of a food safety problem in China is not something that the CCP likes to rush out and do. Just look at how she handled the funny milk business, among others. And so far, apparently fewer than 50 cases of actual infection have been reported. No no, the CCP way is to wait until far more people are infected, then maybe they’ll acknowledge something. And then, don’t worry, they’ll go after Indonesia, cuz the CCP way also stipulates that nothing is ever the CCP’s fault. You of all people should be familiar with how the CCP rolls.
May 22, 2011 @ 12:55 am | Comment
14 By yourfriend
Except the CCP does claim to be serious about food safety, it’s just that enforcement is lax and the bureaucracy underdeveloped.
May 22, 2011 @ 2:01 am | Comment
15 By S.K. Cheung
Oh, so you mean the CCP talks the talk but can’t/doesn’t walk the walk. Hmm, that’s similar to some of the commentators on this site.
Well, if the CCP supposedly claims to be serious about food safety without doing anything about it, then it can certainly claim to be angered by value-added eels from Indonesia without doing anything about that either. I guess their reluctance to even say something (even knowing that they would be hollow words) is what makes them “limp-wristed” etc..
May 22, 2011 @ 3:08 am | Comment
16 By Raj
yourfriend
Except the CCP does claim to be serious about food safety, it’s just that enforcement is lax and the bureaucracy underdeveloped.
So you’re saying that the CCP cares but is incompetent?
May 22, 2011 @ 7:09 pm | Comment
17 By ecodelta
Off topic
It has been an interesting experience on the ground of the 2011 Spanish Revolution at Sol square today in Madrid.
We, two Spaniards, both married with Vietnamese women talking about the single party regimes in VN and CH, and their niceties. Behind us the people camped on the square.
Frank opinions exchanged between us that can only be get without a chocking GFW or somebody menacingly breathing down your neck.
And here and there, groups of young Chinese people (there is a significant Chinese community on nearby streets). On many of the Chinese youth there was a strange expression on their faces as they looked around…. an expression.. that brought back to me memories of TIASQ. I wonder what was running on their mind
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_Spanish_protests
May 23, 2011 @ 7:10 am | Comment
18 By King Tubby
Eco Nice one.
Another off topic. Maybe its time to give China a rest as punching bag.
If you want a real laugh, try Pakistan with its naval base being presently destroyed by 15 militants, and all the general gloating in the Indian press since OBB got waxed. Also nice to see a partial confirmation today of my post on FOARPS site weeks ago to the effect that OBB was sold out to the CIA by some venal Pak, and was not tracked down thru years of US intel diligence.
However, if you cannot drag yourself away from China, read up on the Politburo’s very recent admissions about financial, environmental and social shortcomings in respect to the Three Gorges project, which is now little more than a polluted mudflat in places. This belated taking responsibility for the whole gig makes me extremely suspicious: expect a serious disaster shitstorm there in the near future. We are a responsible oligarchy and we warne ya!!! Bet half the farm on this prediction. (Tons of reporting on this report.)
May 23, 2011 @ 1:46 pm | Comment
19 By Raj
Tubby, so the question is who’s the scapegoat going to be? Are the factions in the CCP going to try to get someone from their opponent’s camp fired over it?
May 24, 2011 @ 3:50 am | Comment
20 By King Tubby
@Raj. Well, it certainly hasn’t affected Bo Xilai’s capacity to push for another mega hydro project for his fiefdom.
http://www.eco-business.com/news/chongqings-biggest-dam-to-start-construction/
I think you would need a good map of Chongqing and the Three Gorges here. A mega city of 23 million people minus water sort of pisses all over an ambitious pols popularity.
This read by the Guardian is as good as any.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/may/20/three-gorges-dam-china-warning
I suspect that the State Council has even more precise information of inpending disaster, and by going public now it is softening up public opinion.
Basically, what with climate change and the total exhaustion of China’s aquifers, the Three Gorges will be a major CCP embarrassment within 5 years time. Failed in all its mission statements: provision of cheap energy; transport access into China’s hinterland whilst exacerbating environmental disaster points.
People on this site don’t pay sufficient attention to water/environmental issues.
May 24, 2011 @ 7:21 am | Comment
21 By Bowen
Another thing related to global Times and People’s Daily
Just found something strange and interesting about China-Redaktion der Deutsche Welle and it former Chinese stuffs.
The chinese news was first seem on sina.com argues that Chinese origin stuffs have been treat unjustice and made to leave due to DW’s censorship. Looks comment. but in relate to DW’s report tendency on PRC, I wonder the CHinese article which suppose to be origin in English version of China Daily truth or fale.
As I manage to make a correct spelling in german, I found that, as far as now can see, the article was publish in English by Chinese official media (http://english.people.com.cn/90001/90780/91342/7387241.html). Unfortunately I fail to find out any either german or english source of the blame from these “stuffs” from other new agency.
As my provisional judgement of this even, it’s an false news aimming at attacking DW due to their right-tendency on reporting China.
But I know false report is a serious accusation, therefore, I am asking you and your friends in Peking Duck to help me out and search this.
I do hope to see China has smarter foreign policies, but playing low false report tricks, just, well so low. ,
May 24, 2011 @ 6:52 pm | Comment
22 Posted at www.pekingduck.org
[…] to the commenter who tipped me off to this. Baked by Richard @ 9:01 am, Filed under: Censorship, China Tags: […]
May 25, 2011 @ 9:27 am | Pingback
23 By yourfriend
So you’re saying that the CCP cares but is incompetent?
Nothing that nice. They claim they care, but they’re incompetent. In other words, they’re like any developing democracy except more efficient by a factor of ten.
May 26, 2011 @ 1:10 am | Comment
24 By yourfriend
ecodelta
It has been an interesting experience on the ground of the 2011 Spanish Revolution at Sol square today in Madrid.
If you want a revolution in China, I suggest the Spaniards lend them their experience in creating 20% unemployment.
May 26, 2011 @ 1:12 am | Comment
25 By S.K. Cheung
One wonders if Chinese people are satisfied with a government that claims to care about food safety but can’t really do much about it, or whether they would prefer a government that actually provides them with food safety.
May 26, 2011 @ 2:02 am | Comment
26 By yourfriend
SK Cheung
One wonders if Chinese people are satisfied with a government that claims to care about food safety but can’t really do much about it, or whether they would prefer a government that actually provides them with food safety.
Like India’s democratic government, that provides its people with the luxury of 4 million preventable diarrhea deaths from poor sanitation.
Logic isn’t your strong point, so please tell me your fairy tale version of how overthrowing the CCP will result in magically improved food safety standards. In fact they will deteriorate if anything.
May 26, 2011 @ 2:46 am | Comment
27 By yourfriend
And that’s 4 million deaths PER YEAR. This beloved social experiment of yours has killed almost a hundred million Indians in the last 30 years alone, while the CCP has lifted five times that number out of poverty- even more if you take the real measure of poverty (indebtedness/net worth), even more if you take into account real measures of living standards (in PPP).
Democracy-lovers are one of two things- evil or ignorant.
May 26, 2011 @ 2:51 am | Comment
28 By S.K. Cheung
“Like India’s democratic government…”
—what’s that, man’sbestfriend? You didn’t just make another comparison, did you? Are you getting paid piecemeal? Is that the reason for all the comparisons? Perhaps you can show me in #25 where I was talking about India, or sanitation. Once again, I’ll wait….And if you’re really clever, you can maybe show us how this thread relates to India and sanitation. Then again, you’re clearly not that clever.
a) the definition of insanity is to try the same thing over and over, and expect different results. Food safety is a crock under the CCP after 61 years. How much insanity would you impose on Chinese citizens (from overseas, no less)?
b) I’ve never said Chinese people should “overthrow” the CCP. But I do say that Chinese people should get to decide who governs them. There is a difference, but perhaps you are too dense to perceive it.
c) the CCP has lifted many out of abject ridiculous poverty, but they have hardly done much with poverty overall in China…again not that that has anything whatsoever to do with this thread. If there is one thing you are good at, it’s bringing everything back to your standard talking points. It’s like when I ring a bell, and you salivate.
May 26, 2011 @ 4:27 am | Comment
29 By yourfriend
I’ve never said Chinese people should “overthrow” the CCP. But I do say that Chinese people should get to decide who governs them. There is a difference, but perhaps you are too dense to perceive it.
TRANSLATION: DEMOCRACY FIXES ALL PROBLEMS
Logic fail, try again.
May 26, 2011 @ 7:55 am | Comment
30 By S.K. Cheung
Ummm, I think your auto-translator is on the fritz. Maybe try Google or something. But again with the caps, nice work, that’s some real flare you’re showing there.
Anyhow, quite a few questions left over from #28 that you seem to have overlooked. Give them a try when you can find the stones. Good luck.
May 26, 2011 @ 12:35 pm | Comment
31 By yourfriend
It’s flair, learn proper English. If I don’t answer your questions it’s because they’re asinine enough to require pay.
May 28, 2011 @ 3:09 am | Comment
32 By S.K. Cheung
You’re right, my bad on the spelling.
Like I said, if you can’t answer some simple questions…well, you do what you gotta do. Asking you questions is such a rewarding exercise though, and that’s just when you can’t answer them. When you do try to answer them, it transcends rewarding and ventures toward the comically sublime.
May 28, 2011 @ 6:06 am | Comment
33 By S.K. Cheung
“Like I said, if you can’t answer some simple questions…well, you do what you gotta do.”
I’ve got an endless supply of questions that you can’t answer.
May 28, 2011 @ 1:11 pm | Comment
34 By S.K. Cheung
Now the Supreme People’s Court has decreed that if people die due to food safety violations, those violators will face the death penalty. I guess the CCP just put its food safety enforcement on steroids.
May 31, 2011 @ 1:21 am | Comment